Spamano: Save my Life
by bms408
Summary: When you go blind to the people who love you, sometimes, you just need someone to remind you how much you're loved. Sometimes, it can determine whether or not you pick to stay alive in this world. Short, depressing Spamano story. Human names used. Contains cutting, swearing, and attempted suicide.


**Series:** Hetalia(Human names used)

**Pairing: **Spamano(established relationship)(boy x boy)

**Rating:** M

**Trigger Warnings: **Swearing, cutting, attempted suicide

**Author's Note: **This is the first fan fiction I've written in a while. Sorry if it's not too good. It's also possible they're a bit ooc. Let me know if there's way to improve my writing style. Constructive criticism is always welcomed.

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><p>Lovino took a sharp breath through his teeth as the steel blade cut his wrist. The blood trailed down his fingers forming a small puddle. His silent screams turned to sobs. This was all <em><strong>his<strong>_ fault.

"Big brother, please. Come out of there." A voice outside the door called. That voice belonged to Lovino's good for nothing younger brother Feliciano.

Lovino had locked himself in the bathroom. He refused to come out. He's tried twice before, but this time, he was going to end it all. He was tired of everyone loving Feliciano more than him. Even his own boyfriend loved his brother more. It made him sick. He didn't want to be unloved anymore.

"Lovino! Stop it and come out here." His brother said, trying to open the locked door in a panic.

There was no response from Lovino.

"That's it. I'm calling Tonio_._" Announced Feliciano.

"No. Not him." Lovino whispered; too quiet for Feliciano to hear.

Lovino brought the blade back to his wrist and started making another red line across his skin. His sobs grew louder as he watched the red liquid flow from his arm. His tears mixed with the blood on the tiled floor. _'A few more cuts should do it.' _He thought to himself as he brought the blade back up and made a third cut. His sobs echoed the small bathroom. He had to finish quick. It was only a matter of time before Antonio would show up and stop him. He leaned his head back onto the wall behind him and cut again. He closed his eyes and listened to the frantic pacing of his brother outside the door. _'This is it fratello. It's over.'_

As Lovino felt himself slipping away, he was suddenly startled conscious by a rather violent pounding on the door. "Lovino, let me in right now!" the man outside the door bellowed. It was Antonio.

"Fuck off." Lovino choked. He was too close to his goal to stop now.

The Spaniard's pounding didn't stop. "Lovi stop it! Let me in! Please!"

"Go away! Let me die in peace bastardo!" Lovino sobbed.

"Dios maldita sea! Lovino don't you dare!" Antonio demanded.

Antonio's pounding grew more and more violent. Lovino could hear the Spaniard say something to his brother; then the pounding continued. The loud pounding stopped when the door was kicked off the hinges. Antonio rushed into the bathroom and fell to his knees before Lovino. He grabbed the Italian's wrist and gasped at the amount of blood loss. He knew Lovino was only moments away from blacking out if he doesn't stop bleeding. He quickly took off his shirt and tied it tightly around Lovino's wrist. Tears were running down the Spaniard's cheeks as the man before him winced and sobbed.

After Lovino's wrist was tightly wrapped up, Antonio pulled him into an embrace. He stroked the Italian's hair and softly wept. He was almost too late. He almost lost the one he loved most.

Feliciano rushed into the bathroom with the first aid kit. He assisted Antonio in wrapping up Lovino's injuries.

After Lovino was bandaged up, Antonio carried him to his bedroom. He told the younger Italian that he would handle it from here and closed the door. He put Lovino down on the bed very slowly. He then sat on the bed and lifted Lovino's head onto his lap.

"Don't ever scare me like that again mi amor." Antonio spoke with a certain combination of sadness and fear.

Lovino looked up at the Spaniard; eyes half-lidded. "Why does it matter?" he sighed. "Everyone likes Feli more anyway. Even you like him more than me."

"What would make you think that?" questioned Antonio.

"You're always so happy to see him and you always talk about how cute he is and how you want to marry him." Lovino sputtered. He brought his hands up to his face and started to cry. He sat up and turned his back to the Spaniard.

Antonio moved closer to Lovino and hugged him from behind. "Lovi…" he said gently. "Sure I like Feli and find him cute, but I love you. You are the most important, and beautiful, thing in the world. I can't imagine a life without you. Please don't make me live in one."

Lovino turned around to face Antonio. He wiped the tears from his eyes. "Do you really mean that?" he asked.

"Por supuesto." Antonio replied. He leaned in and planted a soft kiss on the Italian's lips.

There was a slight smile spread across the Italian's lips. He cupped the Spaniard's cheeks in his palms and leaned in for another kiss. He now remembered why he wasn't already dead. He fell head over heels in love with the Spanish man before him. Even when he felt no one loved him, Antonio did. He knew Antonio would always love him, even when he's in a bad mood.

"Toni…" Lovino said, getting the Spaniard's attention.

"Hmm." Antonio responded.

"I'm sorry I cut again." Lovino apologized. "I know how much you hate me hurting myself."

"Lovi, I'm just glad that I made it here in time to save you." Antonio sighed.

The two young men lied down on the bed. Antonio's arms were wrapped tightly around Lovino's waist. He nuzzled the back of his neck. He knew that Lovino was fragile and broken. He always tried his hardest to prevent him from hurting himself, but it hasn't worked. He was always cautious of the things he'd say and do just so that he didn't accidentally hurt Lovino.

It didn't take long for Antonio to realize Lovino was asleep. The bandages would be fine for now, but Antonio knew he'd need to take Lovino to the doctor after he woke up; for now however, he let Lovino sleep.

When Lovino woke up a few hours later, Antonio's arms were still around his waist.

"Buena noches mi amor." Said the Spaniard.

Lovino sat up and rubbed his eyes. He saw the bandages on his wrist and remembered what he did. "I cut again." He mumbled.

Antonio nodded in response.

"You also kicked down my bathroom door." Lovino added.

"Si. That happened too." Antonio replied.

"You do know I'm going to make you fix it now." Lovino said with his normal attitude back.

"Si." Antonio chuckled. He paused for a moment. "Te amo Lovi."

Lovino smiled. He leaned in for a light kiss. "Ti amo Toni."


End file.
